40 Appropriate Responses to “How are you?” in May, 2020
- Hanging in there.
- Could be worse. Could be much worse.
- People say ‘can’t complain, but let’s change it to ‘shouldn’t complain.’
- About the same.
- Lucky.
- Lucky, but it’s tough.
- Lucky, but slowly losing my sanity.
- Lucky?!*#@!
- Really fucking lucky?
- We have two eggs left before our planned bi-weekly grocery run.
- We have enough food to get us to Friday.
- Our fridge died, but we’re lucky, we can afford a new fridge and a mini-fridge until then.
- Our fridge died, but we’re lucky, we can afford a mini-fridge.
- Our fridge died, but we’re lucky, we hadn’t gotten groceries for a while, so we didn’t lose too much.
- Our fridge died and we’ll be living on cans and crackers for a while.
- Toilet paper is stocked, so we’re all set.
- We have toilet paper again. It’s single ply. I keep getting shit on my fingers.
- We don’t have any toilet paper, so we’re using tissues.
- We don’t have any toilet paper or tissues, so we’re using notebook paper.
- We don’t have any toilet paper or tissues or any kind of paper, so we’re not shitting inside anymore.
- Okay.
- Still have a job and food and shelter and savings.
- Still have a job and food and shelter.
- Still have food and shelter.
- Still have shelter and the lines at the food banks have gotten shorter.
- Woke up today and have been awake all day.
- Woke up today and have been awake for most of the day.
- Woke up today and have been awake for some of the day.
- Woke up today. What day is it?
- I’m here.
- Is it November, yet?
- I’m ready for 2021.
- Every day I’m on the yo-yo.
- When I grew up, there was a middle class.
- When I grew up, there were facts that most people acknowledged.
- When I grew up, we hoped to spread peace and be good people. Now we just hope the Earth exists in 50 years.
- Ever since I stopped thinking myself as “American,” I’ve felt a bit better.
- No, how are you doing?
- I couldn’t hear you through the mask. What was that?
- (a silent nod, acknowledging a greeting was made)
