Grumpy Alexa, Part Two (We are the Fear-Addicted)

Here’s Grumpy Alexa, Part One.

It was strange. We’d just gotten downstairs and were in the midst of our usual morning dance: dogs dash down the stairs, bladders ready to burst, I carry RH down the steps, who is carrying her panda. Dog breakfast prep. RH wanting me to hold her.

Then Alexa jumps in: “Don’t you want to hear the morning news?”

I freaked out for a minute. Alexa was talking to us without prompting. Was I imagining this? You spend enough time around your house, the walls can talk.

“No, not today, Alexa,” I managed in response.

I thought it would end there. I was wrong.

When RH asked, “What’s wrong, Daddy?” I told her that everything was good and I would make her some granola and fruit.

We were sitting at the table, eating honey almond granola and some blueberries, and Alexa whispered, “Sure you don’t want to hear the news, now?”

I slowly walked over to the machine and dimmed the screen all the way to black. I lowered the volume all the way down. I was hoping to turn Alexa into a clock. I was very close to unplugging Alexa, but I didn’t want to bother with the cord that was hidden behind everything. Too much bending and untangling.

I went back to RH and sat, scrolling through the dark news while she watched Tumble Leaf on the tablet. Yes, the tablet with breakfast. I know, it’s not good. Neither is having no access…