Interplanetary Trip Advisor Review: Earth

Dear Space Traveler,

I am transmitting this review on Day 3,650 of my Earth visit. It was recommended I wait exactly this long before submitting this review in order to gather as much data as possible before determining how worthy Earth is of your inter-planetary vacation allotment. In Earth time, this is 10 years. I see the previous review was from 136 Earth years ago, so this is filled with new information.

I arrived here thinking I would stay for approximately one Earth year, which was half of my inter-planetary vacation allotment. I arrived in my Earthling disguise in Phoenix, Arizona, U.S.A on August 19, 2010. The weather was appealingly similar to my home, which was why I chose Arizona as my destination.

At first, my experience on Earth was pleasant. There was new food to eat, and later regurgitate so as not to block my complex internal food-receptacle with Earth matter. There were beautiful sky colors. Humans call them “sunsets.” Being so close to the sun, the thing they call the “sky” is truly mysterious, and fills with colors I had rarely seen on my home planet. There were interesting animals to observe and document. There was something called a snake, which I befriended but then was attacked by. In general, I enjoyed my first few years here.